Judy H. Wright: The Second Half of My Life

By Judy H. Wright

Have you ever wondered where destiny would lead you? Have you ever pondered whether the road you are taking would lead to fulfillment and happiness? Unlike so many of my friends and family, I have always had the sure knowledge of what was expected of me.

It was under a shade tree surrounded by my teddy bears and dolls that it came to me- I would have six children, write books that would help families, have the opportunity to speak and teach all over the world, and I would live to be 97 years old. That is pretty heavy stuff for a six year old.

I shared this epiphany with my mother, and she never doubted the message. She continued to encourage and support me through every milestone until she died in my arms at age 93. Even while nurturing my family of six children and following my husband's military career, I was gathering the skills to prepare me to "do my own thing." When my children were grown and my parents were gone, I realized that the portion of my life devoted to care-giving and nurturing of my family was complete.

I had 40 years of productive time left on this earth to accomplish all I had set forth to do. However, after carrying so much physical weight on my body for years, I was facing inevitable diabetes and arthritis. My future looked like pain, wheel chairs and doctor's offices. Unless I took action, medical complications would curtail me from fulfilling my destiny.

I approached this issue as I have the many books I have written. I investigated "one more diet" that I could live with for the rest of my life. I interviewed over 100 men and women across the country that had tried the same diets that didn't work before finally finding a method that proved successful. My mind was made up. I chose gastric bypass surgery as a one-time solution. On July 30, 2002, I underwent a procedure called laparoscopic Roux-en-Y. This surgery creates a small stomach pouch which holds less than a cup of food. A section of the small intestine is attached to the pouch that absorbs less food than before. Most patients lose over half their excess weight in the first year and a half. Since my operation, I have lost 115 pounds. This is equivalent to the combined weight of my three granddaughters, Amanda, Lexi and Melissa!

For the first time in years, I feel normal and in control when making food choices. Now I am able to enjoy life to the fullest and have the energy and stamina required helping other families raise their standard of living through my books and workshops. Finally, my spirit and body are in sync and I am ready to go forward. I am able to concentrate on my spirit's promptings during yoga because I am no longer concerned with whether my body will be able to balance, bend or straighten up. For me, this option was a success. It gave me the ability to concentrate again on my writing, and to feel confident when I facilitate workshops or speak to groups. Yes, I have met my goal of being an international speaker and writer!

To travel, teach, and fulfill my destiny I must be a woman of strength, and I must maintain that spirit and energy for the rest of my life. We each create our own reality by our thoughts, actions and belief systems. Hopefully that belief system will include guardian angels and a success team who will guide and assist us in our journey.

I have an obligation to that little girl under the shade tree who understood her life's purpose half a life time ago. The message that was shared with me and I now share with my children, my grandchildren, and the families that I work with is to listen carefully to the still small voice within that tells us we are important and have something of value to share with the world. The time to share your unique gift may not be now, but it will be someday and so always be in the process of becoming, learning and growing. Be open to possibilities that life and the angels have in store for you, and you will find the right road to fulfillment of your destiny.

This article was written by Judy H. Wright, Missoula, Mt for a book called Women of Strength and Spirit. Soon to be available on her website: www.ArtichokePress.com To sign up for the free e-zine, purchase books, tapes and workshops on human relations in the journey of life, please go to the website or call
406-549-9813

Judy H. Wright is an author of over 20 books and many articles on human relations. Although she does much work on a national level concerning Hospice and end-of-life, she works as a parent educator in her daily life. She feels strongly that her destiny is to touch the lives of young parents, internationally, to teach them common sense methods of child rearing that will enhance the harmony and dignity of the whole family. For more information please go to http://www.ArtichokePress.com

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Kaye Bailey: Living After WLS Success Story

It’s For the Rest of Your Life

I found out I was fat on the first day of kindergarten when the little girl sitting next to me on the floor pointed at my chubby knees and told me I was fat. I didn’t even know what fat was but I could tell it was bad and I didn’t want to be fat. Until that day I had been unaware I was different. But there I was, a five-year-old girl sitting cross-legged on the floor in my pretty red first-day-of-school dress learning a new word that would define me for twenty-five years.

Then I had laparoscopic gastric bypass surgery and my world turned around. After a lifetime of unsuccessful dieting the pounds melted away and I became a thin, fit, healthy person! The decision to have surgery took courage, nerve, and a little bit of plain old faith. It was my last hope, my last resort, the end of the road for a thirty-year-old fat woman sitting on the kindergarten floor.

And it WORKED!

On the one-year anniversary of my surgery I walked into an upscale dress shop and the clerk looked me over and she said the most glorious words I had ever heard, “You’re a size six, right?”

Absolutely! Size Six! That’s me! (I did have enough self-control not to hug her!)

Every bariatric patient knows how the story of the little fat girl begins. Most of us started our lives heavy and in spite of countless valiant efforts we have never won the battle to become trim and healthy. Each of us could fill a large binder with stories of shame, humiliation, fear and outright embarrassment because of our obesity. Sure, we’ve had those fleeting weight loss successes only to have our hearts broken when the pendulum swings from weight loss to weight gain. I can’t count the nights in my lifetime I spent awake wishing and dreaming to wake up thin and fit and beautiful. I prayed to every God I’d ever heard about for a miracle. I suppose every overweight person prays for a miracle.

If you are visiting this website you have studied and consulted, discussed and prayed about your decision for weight loss surgery. You have chosen surgery as your miracle. Congratulations! You have shown great courage! You have the spirit to take action in the face of great fear! You have made a decision you will never regret! You are about to start the adventure of your lifetime. Now you are at the crossroad where you stop dreaming and begin living the miracle!

During the first few months after surgery you will experience wonderful changes as your body drops the pounds, seemingly without effort on your behalf! This time truly is a window of opportunity where a patient discovers the person who has been hiding inside for so long. Suddenly your face will have structure; you might lose a chin (or two!) Your body will shrink so fast that clothes that fit one day will be hanging off your incredible shrinking figure the next!

While it may appear to onlookers that you are losing the weight without personal struggle or effort, this really isn’t true. Physically the pounds are melting away. But inside there are struggles every day and issues to overcome. Some patients report symptoms of depression during this phase of rapid weight loss – so much changing so fast! Others report extreme highs and elation as they see their new healthy self magically appear in the mirror. People surrounding the rapidly diminishing patient may de-value the effort it takes for person to accomplish massive weight loss. They may not understand the physical and mental toll this rapid weight loss is taking. This surgery requires a complete retraining of your body. Nothing you have done in the past to feed your body will you be able to continue doing. How many people would call a complete body overhaul easy?

There are people in our world, fat and thin alike, who see weight loss surgery as a magic pill – the easy way out of the big bodies we are lugging around. We’ve all heard, and been hurt by their comments, “just quit eating all that food and exercise – it’s easy to lose weight.” Easy to lose weight? Not damn hardly! If that were true then a third of our population wouldn’t be struggling with obesity. Losing weight and keeping it off is never easy. Not before surgery. Not after surgery. Never-ever-never.

But the good news: with weight loss surgery you will be armed with the most powerful, the most effective tool ever in the history of weight control! There is no other pill, program or plan in existence that has the enduring proven success of weight loss surgery. You will have this tool for the rest of your life. Unless you deliberately have it reversed it can never be taken from you.

I believe bariatric maturity is reached when you understand one word: respect. You are a bariatric adult when you respect your tiny tummy, when you respect the science of your body, and when you respect yourself. Sure, we all experience an occasional lapse of judgment; that old lover of ours – food - is flaunting temptations every single day. But the bariatric patient is a powerful person. You have already shown great courage in the face of fear. You have built on your infant and teenage experiences and become an adult embracing all the good things your tiny tummy has given you. You know where you came from and you’ll be damned if you’re ever going back! You are a bariatric adult and one of life’s finest success stories! The battle isn’t easy; it will be fought every day for the rest of your life. But you are armed for the fight and you are winning! You are a bariatric adult! You have arrived!
Congratulations! Enjoy your bariatric experience!

It’s for the rest of your life!

Hints for Writing your WLS Success Story

Write "Your" Slice of Life: 6 Quick and Easy Steps to Writing a Personal Essay
By Judy H. Wright

Do you know why the “Chicken Soup for the Soul” series is so popular? Aside from terrific marketing and unequaled publicity, readers love the stories and personal essays. They are short, personal and teach a lesson or moral. If you would like to be a better writer of the personal essay, opinion pieces, reports and letters to the editor just follow the suggestions listed below:

1. Be brief. Many written reports or stories are 500 words or less. However, there is a general rule that an essay is between two and twenty typed, double-spaced pages. The most important criteria to remember is that a good piece needs to be an unbroken reading experience. The reader will lose interest if it is too long or wordy.

2. Tell a story. A personal essay is a story that has happened to you or that you know about firsthand. The reader assumes that it is nonfiction and that it will contain details and descriptions with which we are familiar. Structure your story around examples, using a pencil as your paintbrush to evoke images and paint a picture in the reader’s mind.

3. Make a point. You will want to illustrate your point, teach a lesson, explain a specific topic, or even support or criticize an idea. Your goal is to win sympathy or agreement. Do not turn it into a sermon or a soapbox to present the superiority of your ideas by including "shoulds" or “musts" aimed at the reader.

4. Use your senses. Enliven your essay with sensuous detail like how it smelled, tasted, sounded or felt. Make the reader feel like they are seeing and experiencing it through your body.

5. Tell about the ordinary. Personal essays are often best when they describe a common but freely shared experience. It doesn’t have to be about being a survivor of the Twin Towers. Talk about your reaction to 911. Or tell us about watching a sunset or baking bread. When you talk about walking your dog, take us along.

6. Make it engaging. An essay should arouse curiosity about life. Instead of preaching, invite us to consider your point of view by sharing the particular experience that brought you there, describe what happened, how you reacted, and why you interpret your experiences the way you do.

Think about your own interests and areas of special knowledge, activities, skills, attitudes, problems as well as typical obstacles faced in life. Teach us what you gained or lost in your life lesson. It is much easier to be convincing when you can draw from personal and firsthand information. Write it today. Submit it to Chicken Soup for the Soul or your local newspaper and become a published author. There are readers out there who want to share your slice of life.

© 2005 Judy H. Wright

This article has been prepared for your use by Judy H. Wright, author and life educator. You have permission to reprint it in your ezine or newsletter as long as the author and her web address is included http://www.ArtichokePress.com; 406-549-9813. Check out the website for upcoming workshops, tele-classes and books. You will also find FREE articles and be able to subscribe to the ezine The Artichoke-finding the heart of the story in the journey of life.

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